Everything you need to know about intention setting and ways to practice it

New year’s resolutions are notoriously difficult to keep. We often focus on the things we think we 'shouldn’t' be doing, and it can leave us feeling like failures before the first month of the year is even complete. So this year, why not swap those stringent New Year rules for something a little more positive? According to life coach and TBalance Crystals founder Tori Boughey, intention setting is all about focusing on what you want to achieve and experience from the year, and considering the actions you might take in order to do so. Here, she tells us what intention setting is for, and how to go about it.

What is intention setting?
Intention setting is all about what you do want from your life, rather than what you want to cut out. This could range from specific intentions such as 'I intend to get promoted at work', to more subjective, inward-focused intentions such as 'I intend to live more in the moment'. So consider your intentions as clear, concise wishes for the year ahead, alongside actionable steps you can take towards achieving them.

“Intention setting is such a powerful way to make progress towards your goals,” Boughey says. “I am a huge fan of visualisation, and getting creative about what it is you’re wanting to draw into your life, and this is such a great moment to strip it all back, look at the blank 365 days ahead and get clear about what you’re wanting from the year.”

And if you’re still in a post-festivities daze and have set neither intentions nor resolutions for the new year, fear not—Boughey says we still have a little bit of time left to ponder what we want from 2023.

“Wise words from our in-house astrologer Narayana Montufar, which I’ve taken on board myself this year, are that we should actually be waiting a couple of weeks before properly setting our intentions for the year,” Boughey tells us. “The reason being: Mercury and Mars are in Retrograde. Mars rules desire, drive and masculine energy, and has been in retrograde since October 31, and Mercury rules communication, thought process and the mind, and this area will be transforming until January 18. In addition, until January 12, the retrograde of Mars and Mercury will overlap—there is a lot going on! The vibe is incredibly introspective; ask, seek, pause, wonder and ruminate.”

How do you kickstart the intention-setting process?

First, you need to set the intentions themselves. If you have very specific goals in mind, Boughey recommends a 'granular' approach. First, make a list of all the things you’re hoping to draw into your life this year, then write a few points under each one on what you could do specifically to reach this goal. “This is key, because when you check in on the goals, you don’t want to feel constantly disheartened by looking at them and thinking ‘I haven’t reached that’. You want to be able to look and think, ‘great, I’ve done that part… what’s next’,” she explains. “I would suggest checking back in on a fortnightly basis for the first month or two and then perhaps monthly, going forward.”

And if you don’t have specific, practical goals, such as a new job, or a house move? Try turning the focus inward, and consider personal aspirations and desires you might have. “This is a great option for those who aren’t feeling like they necessarily know what it is they want from the year, but know that starting with themselves is a great place to begin,” Boughey says. “And it really, truly is—we are at the centre of our lives, the only ones in control of what does and doesn’t happen for us, and there’s something so empowering about feeling motivated, centred and in charge of yourself.”

Rather than setting a very specific intention, which can feel daunting, you could try choosing an affirmation or a word for your month or year. “One of my most recent ones has been ‘trust’, and I have it written in big black letters on cards around my house—the inside of the front door, the fridge, my water filter and my bedside light, for example,” says Boughey. “These nudges have been great reminders to continue to turn inwards and trust in the moment where needed.”

And how do you keep it going?

The purpose of intention setting is to move closer to your goals each day, week or month, but the way in which you choose to focus your attention is up to you. Ultimately, vocalising or writing down your intentions and reflecting on them regularly can help you to stay connected to them.

“This takes time and commitment. When you start seeing results is when you show up for yourself time and time again, and being mindful is one of the best approaches,” says Boughey. You can choose the mindfulness practice that best works for you, whether that’s meditation and visualisation or something more active such as pilates, running, swimming or even cooking. Journalling is another way to focus on your thoughts and check in with your intentions regularly.

“You may or may not be the type to enjoy getting quiet with yourself, but I promise it’s something that will become a steady foundation for positive change,” she adds. “If sitting with incense and your thoughts is too much for you, begin with some walking meditations. This means leaving your phone on airplane mode and getting outside with yourself and becoming mindful to what’s around you—let your thoughts flow and walk until you find somewhere you’d be happy to sit for five minutes. When sitting, focus on the breath: in for four counts and out for six.”

But most importantly, enjoy it. “It doesn’t need to be rigid: make the process of intention setting what you want it to be,” says Boughey. Rather than cutting things out of your life, this approach is all about welcoming the new, and moving towards something altogether more positive.

This piece originally appeared in Harper's Bazaar UK