A guide to everything you need to know about how your body responds to motherhood

Freshman 15 is often used to define the weight you pile on in the first year of college. Comfort food, junk food, new food, midnight snacking with friends, candy bars at gas stations, and that one thing no student life is complete without—pizza. 

My 'freshman 15' came a bit early! At 13, I moved my entire world from Delhi to Geneva. The contrast was intense and while dealing with the emotional upheaval, food became my one outlet, an ally that understood me. But I barely understood what it was doing to me. Comfort came at a (heavy) cost. For the next 12 years, I battled with my weight, and every Monday it was a new crash diet that I would put myself on. I’ve tried it all—the cabbage soup diet, the no carbs diet, the Atkins diet…you name it.

At 25, something clicked, I was tired of the feeling of not loving myself and the way I looked, but more than that, I was tired of people constantly feeling as though they had a right to comment on my body and weight. It still fascinates me that the first thing that one feels the need to comment on is how you are looking. What happened to a genuine, “how are you today?”

And my journey into the fascinating world of fitness and food started, a journey only for ME, because, you see, if your intention is not right, the results are never going to come. You have to be crystal clear on why you are doing what you are doing. Get over yourself before you get over your weight.

With that said, here is what I followed in my “pre mother” days (fret not, I have you covered for all stages of a woman’s life, we are just starting with this one.

My pre-mother fitness checklist

1. I got a personal trainer and that changed my world.  It also made me realise the importance of choosing the right person to train with—they need to inspire you and push your boundaries when you are ready for it. Himanshu Sharma, aerobics trainer and EMS coach (@bodyrebootdelhi @fitnessbyhimanshu) says, “Fitness is not a fad, it’s a lifestyle choice. No matter how busy you are or what phase in life you are at, finding that me time is essential. Committing to any form of exercise on a regular basis is the first step to fitness.”

2. I threw out the delusional diets. I spent time researching and gathering information to create a meal plan that a) I could stick too b) reacted well with my body.

3. I cleaned out my kitchen so there was no temptation. The first two weeks, I cut every form of sugar and unrefined products from my diet, and gave my body a kickstart. Thereafter, I slowly started introducing things I missed and enjoyed but in moderation. Most importantly, I began to respect myself a lot more. The next four years, I saw my body transform, and by 29 years, the year I got married, I did not care two hoots about anyone else because I felt fab and I looked fab!

At 34 years old, on a hot summer morning, something felt different. Could it be that bottle of champagne I decided to finish the night before, or was it something else? My gut instinct told me to take a pregnancy test, and lo and behold, those two pink lines showed up in a few seconds. Of course, I was elated, but I was also petrified of what my body was going to go through again since this was my second baby.

With my first pregnancy, I put on a whopping 20kgs. And it took me two years to finally get some semblance of my body back. You know all those things they tell you whilst you are pregnant that someone ought to really put an end to—"Eat whatever you like, you are eating for two now!" I fell for all of that and became a cookie monster, chowing down chocolate digestive biscuits by the dozen and those 2 am hunger pangs that no one tells you about while feeding the baby got me making myself some serious night time snacks. The irony was that I did not get any medical advice or guidance, or even a mere discussion about the importance of staying fit while being pregnant. Luckily and thankfully, things are changing.

Jayati Sehgal, founder and pre and postnatal instructor at Zaazen Wellness says, “ The awareness of the benefits of yoga and exercise during pregnancy has started to build tremendously in India, with most doctors strongly recommending that expecting mothers should have active and energetic pregnancies. One of the commonly known benefits of practicing prenatal yoga is that it is very helpful in preparing for a natural vaginal birth. A lot of the key poses and mobility based movements we include in our classes are meant to target flexibility in the hip and pelvis which has shown to be hugely beneficial for labour and birth.”

For those of you who may have had a c-section, Sehgal believes that “the recovery time is a lot faster if you have been doing yoga as well as light strength training throughout your pregnancy. Muscles that are fit and flexible, rather than tight and weak help with faster healing.”

So, the second time around, I had decided there was no way I was going to go down that route again. Much to the apprehensions of family who were equally happy for me not to exercise, I took thing things under my control, and this is what I followed:

My becoming a mother fitness checklist

1. I researched and spoke to fitness professionals whom I trusted to understand what was okay and not okay to do as far as exercise was concerned, and then ultimately followed a routine that my body was telling me it was comfortable with. As I became bigger and more advanced in my pregnancy, my exercise also changed to suit what I could and could not do. I empowered myself with knowledge so I could take decisions myself. Zoe Modgill, fitness trainer and founder of Stronger with Zoe, a fitness platform for women was one of my biggest inspirations and go-to person whilst I was pregnant. She says, “As a certified fitness professional, pre and postnatal certified, I’ve trained and encouraged thousands of women to improve their relationships with health and fitness! All this while, developing my passion to experiment with all kinds of strength, both physical and mental! Having just had a baby, I’ve first hand experienced the biggest changes that a woman will ever experience during her life! And let me tell you, the journey back to a pre-pregnancy Modgill has been one of the hardest and quite unreal. Motherhood will change you for the better and will highlight the importance of listening and reconnecting with your body. We as women need to embrace this new version of ourselves.”

2. I ate as I was normally eating, but was a little more conscious of putting really good, nutritious things in my body—from fruit to green veggies—I upped my game to ensure I was feeding myself and my baby only goodness.

3. I  stopped obsessing over Instagram mom bodies and all those women (hats off to them) who gave birth one day and looked like super models the day after. Social media pressure and anxiety to be a certain way for the world to see is a real thing and I did not want it as part of my journey. I followed people who inspired me, who spoke the truth, and who were real.

Food is a big part of who I am, I enjoy eating it, I enjoy cooking it, it’s an activity that brings my family together, it’s a major part of how we plan our holidays, and it’s a huge part of what I do in my professional career. So I had to find a way to become friends with food and not make it my enemy. Today, as I write this article, I celebrate nine months of being post-partum and I feel strong and fit. Thanks to my continued workout during my pregnancy, the ease with which I got back to my fitness routine was incredible. “Once we realise that any kind of workout is an integral part of our daily life, 80 percent of our fitness goal is achieved. This consistency leads to not only betterment of our physical fitness but also various other aspects of our health. It’s a proven fact that working out leads to release of endorphins (happy hormones) helping our mental health in such hectic and stressful times,” says Sharma.

Speaking as a post-mother now, here are some simple guidelines to keep this lifestyle sustainable.

My post-mother fitness checklist

1. Give your body the rest it needs post your delivery and ease yourself back into a routine ideally after three months, post-partum, especially if you had a c-section.

2. Invest your time in the beginning, even though it may seem tedious and boring, in reconnecting with your core muscles. Understand and educate yourself about Diastsis Recti (abdominal separation) and be mindful that whatever fitness regimen you follow, it helps you fixyour situation and not make it worse. 

3. Remember that snack tray during feeding times? Fill it with things that are good for you and that will give you energy—foxnuts, almonds, granola, energy balls…you get the drift.  

5. Eat everything, but in moderation—never deprive yourself of anything. You feel like eating that hot chocolate fudge, do it, and the next day, be a little more mindful of what you eat.

6. Try different things to make your exercise fun and also give yourself a chance to learn a new skill—from dancing to weight training, there is so much out there that will burn those calories and make you feel on top of the world.

But, that said, it’s not that easy. It takes time, mental strength, and perseverance. Your body will never be the same again, for those who can relate—from stretchmarks to saggy breasts, stomach pooches to surgery scars, it’s all very real. But let me remind you that you produced and nurtured an entire human being inside of you for 9 months. If that’s not incredible then I don’t know what is. So show yourself some love and let yourself help you. And as Modgill would say, “Be the best version of yourself.”

Please note: All prenatal exercise should be performed under the supervision of trained instructor.

Ambika Seth is the co-founder of CAARA and a mother of two.

Feature Image: @sonamkapoor / Instagram